I am Unnecessary

So in this last month and couple weeks I've clocked in...ready for this?...at least 40 hours of driving time!!! Isn't that crazy!?! I've driven to New Braunfels, Beaumont, Dallas, San Antonio and back to College Station a few times. Needless to say I'm a little tired of my car and the road- something that I usually enjoy. But in all that driving I've ended up in places that I have loved- home to see my best friend get married, another friend marry, tons of family for 4th of July (almost caught a shark by the way!), floated the river, walked the Riverwalk, made lots of fun memories, hung out with old friends and made some new ones, and had some really sweet time of journaling, prayer and worship.

I am tired.

But, at the same time, I am refreshed.

I just got back from a worship conference in Dallas with some really fun friends. I felt like it was a pretty full 3 days, even though we kind of skipped out on some of the conference :) Thursday, the second day of the conference, was the best for me. That morning I dropped off the girls that came with us and headed to Barnes & Noble to read and journal for a while. It was so good and I hadn't journaled in a while so it was definitely needed. I was processing a lot that day, but it was so good looking back. I got to reflect a lot this week on what I do as a worshipper and "lead worshipper."

As I thought about it for a while and really thought about worship I wrote this: "I am merely someone who can help people come to worship Jesus- BUT I am not necessary, I am not essential to this. There are no gifts, skills, or words I have that can merit true worship for others. They can assist and help usher, but ultimately worship is about Jesus and a group or individual loving Him through their heart, soul, body and mind-all for the glory of Jesus. Worship is obedience poured out- sometimes and often times creatively through song, art, dance...etc."

So... I am unnecessary, but so grateful He still uses me and allows me to play and sing and worship with other believers.

Thursday night I was totally blessed by Jason Upton and the way he led. He started off by saying something like none of us are professionals at being in the presence of Jesus- we're all beginners. That pretty much knocked me over with conviction!

One of the verses stated and spoken about a lot was Psalm 33:1-5, "Shout for joy in the LORD, o you righteous! Praise befits the upright. Give thanks to the LORD with the lyre; make melody to Him with the harp of 10 strings! Sing to Him a new song; play skillfully on the strings, with loud shouts. For the Word of the LORD is upright, and all His work is done in faithfulness. He loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of the steadfast love of the LORD."

I love the details in this verse. Sing a new song, play skillfully, with loud shouts. Why do we do all of these things, why do we worship? Because His Word is upright and because He is faithful. Isn't it funny how often we ask God to be faithful? That's like asking water to be wet. It's who He is and always will be-FAITHFUL. It's because of His abundance in His faithfulness that we can constantly be singing a new song.

So I am really glad I went to the conference. It was beautiful to see another group of believers loving Jesus. But I'm definitely glad to be back in College Station for a few days...that's right just a few. I'm headed to Laity Lodge camp in Leakey on Wednesday to lead a girls' worship night there. I would love it if you would pray for me as I prep for that. I'll actually be leading worship and speaking for a little bit. So a new challenge for me, I've never really spoken at anything before. But I'm excited to see how it goes and what Jesus wants to do with that time.

So here's to another few hours on the road :)